How to develop confidence when interacting with a stronger leader than you?

Question

Project management

Description: He began to lead his group of 3 people. When I work with them, I am completely confident both in myself and in my group, incl. in terms of competencies, etc.
Problem: At meetings, during discussions with my management, or other people, if I feel that the person sitting next to me (with whom I have to interact) is stronger than me (not physically, but psychologically, spiritually or something), then all inspiration disappears, "knees tremble", ready to give up their positions, etc.
As an option for comparison and understanding of sensations:
You are a fighter, enter the ring, and there is the same fighter, only 2 meters tall and 198 kg. What is your reaction? :)
Question: How did you get out of this situation? How did you develop confidence in yourself when working, interacting with stronger leaders than you? How to become stronger than them? Please share your experience and advice.

Answer 1

If a particular "cool man" frightens and psychologically suppresses you, just learn to see a diaper in his pants.

Answer 2

Practice, just practice! You are afraid of what you do not know - this is a natural behavior for any living organism. You need to communicate (practice, conflict / fight) more often with this kind of rivals.
You are not afraid of a hamster, because you know that he will not eat you (hamsters from Chernobyl do not count), similarly with the rest of this life.
During my school days, I was afraid of opponents who were a head taller than me (in height and fighting experience). After a couple of years of the section and several Muay Thai competitions, the fear of rivals automatically disappeared. I have a height of 170cm and 72kg of weight, and this does not prevent me from knocking down opponents of any height and weight of 120kg+. I just know that I can do it because I do it periodically in the ring. How do you know if you don't do the same?
Once again, to understand that there is no need to be afraid of "this", you can only through practice and experience of communicating with "this" object...

Answer 3

To begin with, stop evaluating people from a position of "strength".
In the ring, yes. But psychologically, all people are equal. In peacetime, you are not a fighter, but a person, like everyone else.
When you report to your superiors, you are actually doing your job and getting paid for it. If you don't like something or you are not appreciated, then you can always quit - this is your "strength". Nobody wants to lose good employees. Most importantly, value yourself in the presence of your superiors.
Some bosses openly devalue work and people. You need to be able to notice such things, especially about yourself, and learn to ignore them. True, sometimes there is sound (albeit harsh) criticism - it can be taken into account, but not painfully, but adequately.
As a last resort, you can go to a psychologist (and analyze your childhood). It is not joke. See where the problem is. You can put a crutch on a bug in your application, or you can rewrite the application core from scratch. See which is easier.

Answer 4

God created people strong and weak. Samuel Colt made them equal

Buy yourself a suitable talisman and wear it to meetings.
You don't need to show it.
Feelings will change.

Answer 5

Here it remains only to become physically stronger - read: to be sure that on occasion you will kick them in the snot without any problems. Then there will be confidence. Well, plus to this, be sure that after that you will not have big problems. Those. drishchugan, whose father is a colonel of the Ministry of Internal Affairs, will behave impudently, knowing that his ass will be covered.
Well, if we are talking about who is a stronger specialist, then there is nothing to be done - someone is better, someone is worse. As long as these "best" do not start to burrow - "I'm D'Artagnan, and you're all shit." Then only the physical impact. Or threats to them.
It's better to fight here. It is more effective precisely in such "everyday" situations, when you can physically suppress a person. Striking is more effective for self-defense, wrestling is more effective for dominance.

Answer 6

The realization that you "don't care about their opinion of you" (naturally, this is not about rudeness or non-constructiveness, but only about defending your position), puts you on approximately equal footing. Moreover, this works both with colleagues at your level, and with colleagues who are higher than you in the corporate food chain. The main difficulty here is to convince yourself that you do not depend on them and on their attitude. If you are an IT specialist, then this is easy to do - there is a lot of work on the market. And believe me, if you realize this for yourself, then you will be perceived differently by these people.

Answer 7

You are a fighter, enter the ring, and there is the same fighter, only 2 meters tall and 198 kg. What is your reaction?

It is not interesting to defeat the weak. Our whole life is a game. You need to win. It doesn't always work the first time, but you have to try. All your problems are from the fear of losing, and there is nothing to worry about. You just have to try again. You have to be afraid to stop trying.
Well, as for the meetings, we must fight not for victory over a specific person, but for a goal. Sometimes other people can turn out to be right, so suppressing a person is not exactly the right goal. Set a goal to start with and move towards it.

Answer 8

Start copying the behavior and actions of those people whom you consider "cooler" than you.
And vice versa, try to get closer to them.
And do not look for weak opponents.
It is better to lose with a smart than to find with a fool.

Answer 9

What is your plan for the meeting? To be strong, self-confident, tough to defend your position? In your case, a terrible plan, if only because it will fail before the meeting even starts. This constrains your actions - after all, who are you to blather, you can’t even fulfill the simplest plan for a meeting? Try to go to a meeting with a plan exactly the opposite. be afraid, bend, mumble, etc. The advantage of such a plan is that it is guaranteed to be done! And then you have nothing to be afraid of - you have fulfilled the main plan and now there is room for maneuvers.
The same goes for the ring analogy. The only reasonable plan for such a fight is to get scared. Enter the ring, get scared as hell, and then think about how to get out of this situation.