How can a junior stop being nervous?

Question

Career in IT

I'll start a little with a story about how I got my first job. Once, in my 4th year, I got an internship at a state office (I asked for it myself). Visited for 3 months. In principle, he fulfilled the task set for the period of the internship (the end result was achieved, probably not in the best way, but what else to expect from the intern?). At the end they were invited to work, but because I didn’t have a diploma yet, I took it as a technician, but in fact I was engaged in the work of a programmer (half the rate, they paid absolutely pennies - consider they didn’t pay). After another 3 months (when I received a diploma), I was transferred to the position of an engineer, in which I am now working (for a whole week), but already full-time.
All in all, it's probably going well. The profile of my department is very specific, so I need more mathematical background here than knowledge of the C ++ 17 standard and higher (I hint at advanced knowledge of the language). According to the specifics of the work: 1. I have to work with legacy code - there are gaps written back in the 90s, but it is written more or less normally, so I'm slowly sorting it out.
2. The team (small) actively helps me, answers questions without any problems at all (and any, even the most stupid ones).
3. In short, I joined the team well, I spend coffee breaks with them, have lunch, joke, talk, discuss everything in the world.
4. I study the existing code (because it needs to be maintained) and develop a new one (according to new tasks). To the extent possible, of course.
5. Plus, we are actively studying new standards, patterns, etc., I am also actively joining, but it can be difficult, probably due to little practical experience.
6. I take on any work I can do (to be at least a little useful)
Summarizing all of the above, we can say that everything is fine and there is nothing to worry about. But the feeling of anxiety does not leave me to this day, and with the transfer to a new position, it began to grow. It’s not that I’m afraid that I’ll be fired (what to be afraid of, in general), I rather feel out of my element, tk. I understand that I bring little benefit, but they pay regularly. As for professional growth - I study something new at work, on the way from / to work. In the evening (at home) there is no longer the strength and desire to read something, tk. I get very tired and arrive late (I live far from my place of work, I spend 3 hours on the road a day). I feel that my knowledge is growing, but it is disturbing that it is slow (at least it seems to me). I wrote all this chaotically, I sit after a hard day in depression. Maybe you just wanted to share it with someone.

Answer 1

My God, what doctors nafig. The dude has his first job, he doesn’t want to fly out, have you seen a lot of juniors who didn’t stress? T.S. - walk more, in a year it will become easier (but this is not accurate). So in general, 90% of any work is associated with stress. Or when you studied at the university was calm as a boa constrictor?

Answer 2

it's for a psychiatrist

Answer 3

I wouldn't worry if I were you, because there would be something to worry about. Yes, and everyone was once a junior, and they are treated with understanding. My advice - after work 2-3 times a week, go in for some kind of sport, it will relieve stress and depression will go away - better than any psychiatrists / psychologists, and drive yourself less and wind yourself up.
And also read this article , maybe you have this condition)

Answer 4

6. I take on any work I can do (to be at least a little useful)

It is not necessary for absolutely any. If you have a choice, take for those that will be more useful for you - you will understand something, you will bring it to the end, you will learn some points.

But the feeling of anxiety does not leave me to this day, and with the transfer to a new position, it began to grow. It’s not that I’m afraid that I’ll be fired (what to be afraid of, in general), I rather feel out of my element, tk. I understand that I bring little benefit, but they pay regularly

Solve these issues with your immediate curator and boss, as he is called there. You can ask and find out who will do it.
Talk to him about the problem. Set up one-on-one meetings once a week to clarify what your expectations are and what progress you're making. Prepare a short plan for such meetings in advance so that it is not an hour of time to talk about life, but 5-10 minutes to report on what has been done, 5-10 minutes to report what problems you have and that you are now solving them in this way, you need to whether to change something. And maybe 5-10 minutes for feedback from your boss.
You will hold 3-5 meetings in this way, see which of them is the exhaust, and together decide whether to do it more often or less often, and in what format - all this can be adapted along the way. Or they won't be needed at all.
PS In fact, you should already have a curator who would chew it all up for you. In good companies, there is even a planning of the employee’s global goals for six months or a year in advance, according to which you understand that in addition to performing directly daily tasks, you need to grow in the planned direction in order to be able to switch to other tasks that are in your project in a year.

Answer 5

Those who are satisfied with themselves have no motive to change, which means there is no development.

Answer 6

If the authorities are satisfied with everything - sit on the priest evenly and collect the loot, let them pay, they will not become poorer.
If you study something else in your specialty in your free time, then you are doing everything right and continue to develop. Just do not forget to rest, from the tired sense of zero.
And as for the worries due to the fact that "there is little use" - I'm not a team person, I can't understand this trouble. In general, in fact, it doesn’t matter who does more there, who does less. If only they did their part normally)) If the authorities are satisfied, don't worry.
Get grandma. Drink a beer) and don't worry about nothing

Answer 7

while you are young, good hour-long sex completely discourages the desire to be nervous for a day

Answer 8

Read \ look about the "impostor syndrome", there is such a thing. Could this be it)? If it is, then it's okay)

Answer 9

The whole problem is in C++. I also started my way into IT with this language and also suffered for more than 3 years, never having overcome the level of junior.
Then he changed his specialization to test automation and easily upgraded to a leading specialist in 2 years.
Perhaps you just need to change the language and subject area.

Answer 10

Read on the road, since it takes 3 hours. Read in the morning, get up 1-2 hours earlier and read. At lunch.